Here Beside You
by OztheB-rabbit0213
Summary: 6 years after the Farewell Shisengumi Arc Kagura, 20 years old, wandered aimlessly around Edo. She kept blaming herself for what happened that day 6 years ago. She forgot how to smile the way she used to before and even forgot how her laugh sounded like. She lived her everyday life like that throughout the years, until a certain sadistic bastard came and changed her life.
1. Prologue(part one)

**Hello guys! Thank you for giving yourself time just to read this fanfic of mine *** bows *** Uhmm...I'm just a newbie here and this is my very first fanfic so I hope you'll like it!**

 **Warnings: I think there are a lot of wrong grammars that can be found there...I'm very sorry! Also, some bad languages can be read there so...be careful!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Gintama. Sorachi Hideaki-sensei does.**

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 **Here Beside You**

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Prologue (part one)

" _Kagura! Hurry up and ride there!" a certain silver-haired man shouted_

" _But Gin-chan! Nobume is still-"_

 _Before the girl could finish her sentence, Sakata Gintoki pushed her inside the ship "Just hurry up!" he said. "I'll take care of them…just go!"_

 _The girl kept calling, but Gintoki was unable to hear her. The girl was pulled inside and was forced to wait for her 'father' inside. "Idiot Gin-chan!" she said, pouting. Eventually, she got tired of waiting and decided to follow Gintoki. Secretly, she found her way out of the ship until a certain someone stopped her. It was the person she hated the most, Okita Sougo_

" _Oi China! Where do you think are you going?" the sadist asked in his usual deadpan face._

" _It's none of your concern, you Sadist bastard" Kagura said while attempting to escape from him, while sticking out her tongue._

" _Go inside and get yourself healed and-"_

" _Oh will you please just shut the fuck up and let me through, you sadist bastard?!" Kagura said, not letting Sougo finish his sentence. "Get out of my way! Gin-chan needs help!"_

" _Don't let Danna's effort to bring you here, China" he said. "Believe in him will 'ya. And stop being such a kid, shitty brat."_

 _Kagura knew that she won't be able to win over their argument, so she just rand back to the room where she stayed before. Again, she kept waiting and waiting for Gintoki. The fight was still not over, even though they managed to save Kondo Isao, the Shinsengumi Commander, and Matsudaira Katakuriko, the Shinsengumi Commander-General, before their execution. However, they were unable to depart the island because of the Naraku, which continues to attack them. Everyone fought until they die. No one was an exception._

 _After hours of waiting, Gintoki finally arrived, with Sasaki Isaburo on his shoulder and accompanied by Imai Nobume._

" _G-gin-chan_ _!" She shouted while approaching him. She was so happy to be able to see her beloved 'father' and friend safe, but gravely wounded._

" _Watch out!" Nobume warned_

 _The surprised Kagura turned around and realized: She was about to get killed. Kagura was about to get ambushed by a Naraku until-_

 _Kagura closed her eyes, prepared to die but then she felt nothing. She just heard the sound of getting stabbed, but felt nothing. The moment she opened her eyes, she then saw everything. She was there, still alive and standing, in front of the collapsing Gin-chan who shielded her from getting killed. Shocked, Kagura didn't know what to do and attacked the killer, punching him so hard that made him fly meters away. She then realized, everything around her was red. Her mind was full of anger and grief. She was about to lose control when a certain silver light woke her up._

" _Kagura…that's enough" It was Gintoki. That silver light who woke her was Gintoki. Kagura looked at Gintoki, whose body was covered with blood and was barely able to breathe. "You…already did…much…"_

 _And that was the last time Sakata Gintoki's voice was heard._

 _Kagura, 14 years old, witnessed everything._

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And there, Prologue(part one) done!

Sorry for some wrong grammars that can be found in the story. I'm new here .  
Thank you for reading! *bows* and feel free to leave reviews!


	2. Prologue 2

Here beside You

Prologue (part two)

 _A week has passed since Kagura saw that event. Those scenes continued to haunt her in her dreams and invade her peaceful life. As if 'he' wouldn't allow her to be happy and be living quietly after everything that happened. Even so, she didn't want others to get worried over her. She would just put her façade - a sweet and warm smile – whenever someone gets worried, especially her anego._

 _She was busily walking in the streets of Kabuki-cho and humming happily (it was only a fake though) and went straight to the shop where she usually buys her favorite sukonbu._

" _Obaa-san! 30 packs of sukonbu!" she requested._

" _Hai hai." Said the old shopkeeper, who was busy searching for her regular customer's sukonbu. "Here 'ya go, Kagura-chan!"_

 _Kagura immediately grabbed the packs of her favorite snacks from the old lady's hands and bid her good-bye. She opened a pack and ate it. She continued eating and eating until she reached the park, where she usually stayed and lazed off in the past. She went to her favorite bench in that park and continued eating her snacks when suddenly-_

*BOOM*

 _A sudden explosion came. If it was not for her fast reflexes and good senses, she would have died. With that, she already knew who the perpetrator was. It was '_ _ **him**_ _'_

" _Huh? No blood? I guess little China here managed to avoid my attack…tch" and again, the certain Sadist aimed his bazooka at the little Yato girl._

" _WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK ARE YOU DOING, YOU SADIST BASTARD?!" Kagura angrily protested._

" _Trying to kill a certain illegal immigrant who's currently busy with her favorite snack" he said in his usual deadpan look and monotonous voice._

" _I'm not in the mood so fuck off" Kagura said casually, trying to keep her cool._

 _Acting as if nothing happened, Kagura walked out of the place. She really wanted to kill that bastard there or humiliate him, but she was really not in the mood. She don't know whether she was just under the weather or it's because she's currently grieving for someone else. Instead of her red duangua, she was wearing black one. She did it out of respect for her surrogate father during her stay in earth. She suddenly stopped walking, remembering the moments with her beloved Gin-chan._

' _Oi Kagura! Hand me a parfait' 'OI WHO DRANK MY PRECIOUS STRAWBERRY MILK?!' 'Kagura! Hurry up! JUMP IS ON SALE TODAY!' and lastly… 'Kagura…that's enough. You…already did…much'_

 _Remembering her precious Gin-chan's voice and the days they spent together almost made her cry. She wanted to see him again and wanted to hear his nagging voice…but then again, it's impossible. '_ _ **Gin-chan…**_ _' she called and tears almost fell from her eyes when a certain sadist ruined the mood. AGAIN._

" _China…are you crying? Pfft, how weak" he teased as he looked at the pitiful girl_

" _SHUT UP! What do you even know, you stupid Sadist?! Can you even read the atmosphere?!" she shouted._

" _Stop it, China." He said in his usual voice, but his face...was somewhat filled with grief. "Do you think he…Danna, would be happy if he saw you like this?"_

 _Surprised, Kagura looked at him (still pissed though). She didn't expect him to have that kind of face and to be a little…caring? She somehow felt a little happy and a portion of the burden on her shoulders was lifted from her._

 _Quickly, she used this chance and kicked him in the stomach and made him moan out of pain. The impact made the policeman kneel and he glared at the infuriating China girl in front of him._

" _Teme…what do you think are you doing?!" he screamed._

" _It's your fault for letting your guard down, Sadist." Kagura said, while grinning at him._

" _Heh, so you're up again to your game huh…"_

" _Who do you think I am?!"_

 _And then they started to clash with each other. When one managed to hit the other, the latter will give a hit with the pain doubled. Their little brawl continued for hours and people who were passing by just ignored it, for they are already used to it. And finally, it ended. The sun was already setting the time their fight was finished. The outcome? Well, it was a tie. Kagura was lying down, almost unable to catch her breath and Sougo, barely kneeling down using his sword, was also out of breath._

" _So…a draw, huh…" Sougo said, barely catching his breath_

" _Mmmm" that was the only reply Kagura was able to say, for she was so tired to speak._

" _Ne, China…this might be…the last…y'know"_

" _Wh…what…do you…?"_

" _Marked as traitors…we're forced to…leave Edo" He said, finally able to regain his breathing._

 _Shocked by the news, Kagura forced herself to sit. She didn't know if she heard him right. Deep inside, she wished that she didn't heard him correctly._

" _We'll leave early in the morning…I don't know when we're going back here though" He said in his monotonous voice while patting his head, removing unwanted dirt on it._

" _What? So 'ya just came here for some cheesy_ _ **goodbyes**_ _huh, Sadist." She said in her mocking voice._

 _Surprised, Sougo gave out a chuckle and said "Of course not. Did you think I'll give you a hug or a kiss? Don't make me laugh, China" he said while giving her his deadpan_

" _Shut up!" she retorted while raising her middle finger to him._

" _I came here to make a promise." He said._

" _Ohh so you fell for me, uh-huh!" She exclaimed._

" _Baka!" he countered. "Promise me, China. Don't you ever-"_

" _Lose to anyone!" Kagura interrupted, not giving Sougo a chance to finish his sentence. Her voice was full of confidence, but she was still giving him a smug look on her face._

 _Not giving her a reply, Kagura took that as a yes and smiled. Sougo stood up while laughing at the pathetic China, who was still unable to get up. He gave her his one last look. A gentle smiling look which no one ever saw, except for his sister, Mitsuba._

" _See you in five years, or maybe longer, Stupid-sukonbu-lover China" he said while waving his has to her._

 _Kagura didn't reply. She just sat there, watching the shadow of his_ _ **rival**_ _slowly disappearing. When he was out of sight, Kagura gave a large sigh and when she already regained her strength, she saw at the bench. She looked up at the sky, where the moon shined brightly and gave out a soothing silver light which reminded her of Gin-chan. She was about to cry again when the sadist's words rang in her mind 'Do you think Danna would be happy if he saw you like this?'_

" _Fuck it." She said to herself, trying to refrain from crying. She continued to stare at the moon, not knowing that it was already very late at night. She was busy thinking about what she will do in the future. She killed her father, and lost her rival. And for her, she thinks that she lost her right to live at the Edo, or maybe the Earth._

" _Okay. I've decided."_

 _She quickly stood up and headed back at their home._

 _Kagura, age 14, decided at that time. She decided to leave the planet, for she has no right in living there anymore. Decided that she will never be happy, for it made her think that she was betraying the man she 'killed'. Decided to put an end to her easygoing life and live seriously starting that day. She decided to abandon her smile, for the sake of atoning for her sins._

 _Decided to throw away her humane emotions and hid her memories within her stay on earth, except for Gin-chan. That too, was for the sake of atoning for killing the silver light who gave everyone hope and happiness to everyone._

Prologue end


	3. Chapter 1

**Helloooo guysss, it's me**  
Sorry for not uploading the next chapter for a **veeeeery long time** ( ***bows** )  
I have a lot of reasons for that...  
First, school just started I guess three or four weeks ago (I'm not sure...) and we were given **tons of work to do** at the first day  
Second, I planned on posting this last week but then I was **very very sick** (because of stress) so I wasn't able to do so.  
Third, The **internet connection.** (You know what I mean...)  
Lastly, I was so focused on my studies 'cause I'm aiming to maintain my position in the top ( _hopefully, I'll be able to do it..._ )

I'm very very sorry guys for making you wait ( ***bows again and cries** )  
So now, I'm presenting to you the very first chapter of **Here Beside You  
** Enjoy~ ( ***smiles** ) 

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**Disclamer** : I don't own Gintama. If I owned it, I would not be making fanfictions like this and make it a reality~

* * *

 **Here beside You**

 **Chapter One**

 **Kagura's POV**

"OIIIII KAGURA! WHERE'S MY STRAWBERRY MILK?!"

It's been years since I heard that voice…I wonder who's the one talking. As I woke up, I saw a very nostalgic scene. A scene where a certain drunk silver-haired man wakes up a pretty girl asking where his strawberry milk is. And then the girl will fall asleep again, not minding the words of the ranting man. That man will continue to protest to the girl until the latter wakes up. But sorry for him, because instead of an answer to his question, the man will receive a punch on his face, that will send him flying few meters away.

"Shut up! Don't disturb my beauty sleep, Gin-chan!" The girl will shout and go back to sleep.

It feels very familiar…the two of them seems to be very happy, but it only brings pain to my heart. Watching that scene from afar made me give a wry smile but at the same time, it crushes my heart. I wonder why.

"Kagura, we're here"

When I woke up, I saw my older brother with a smile on his face while waking me up.

"Huh? Are you crying?" He asked. "Silly you. Did you miss this country so much that it made you cry?"

I shook my head and wiped my tears away. I stood up and went ahead of my brother to go outside. I was shocked by the scene that I saw. Nothing changed. Nothing really changed – The sunny weather, busy streets and noisy people – they're all the same since the day that I left. I felt relieved, but at the same time, scared. Though once again, I don't know the reason why.

"So Kagura, Onii-chan will go ahead now." Kamui said while patting my head. "Don't become weak just because you returned here, okay?"

And then he went inside the terminal and waved to me. I guess he will return to his old job once again. What do I expect, he only became an alien hunter because he learned that I became as strong as him and accompanied me. So now that I've taken a break from hunting here, he will once again leave me and come back once I'm done with my business here.

 **Normal POV**

 _Kabuki-cho_

Busy streets and wild people, it's all the same. That's what was in Kagura's mind while aimlessly wandering in the lively streets of Kabuki-cho. Though the external appearance did not change, the internal content did. There were so many faces that she did not recognize, and compared to 6 years ago, there were more people that lived there.

 _"_ _I'm hungry…"_

She thought as she heard her stomach growling. Then an idea popped into her mind. She went to her usual shop where she buys her favorite sukonbu. She was so excited, for it has already been 6 years since she last ate a pack.

"Obaa-chan! 20 packs of sukonbu!" She shouted.

However, instead of an old woman's voice, she heard a man's voice. Wondering, he asked the man about the old woman who was the shopkeeper of the store.

"Ahh that was my mom." The man answered while preparing the packs of sukonbu.

" _'_ _Was'_? Where is she?" Kagura asked seriously.

Suddenly, the man's face was filled with sadness. "She died. Two years ago."

Kagura was speechless. She didn't know how to react. She just stared at the man blankly while trying to get over by that news.

"My mother died because of old age. Of course all of her regular customers visited her while she was in the hospital, but she kept asking whether a small girl with vermillion hair came. Every day, she would always ask me that question, but I really didn't know." Then the man started to cry. "And then on her final day, she asked the question once again but I just reluctantly said no.

Kagura was still speechless. She forgot that when she left the planet and her emotions, she also left behind the people who were so important for her without saying a word. At first, she did not regret it. She considered it as an atonement for her 'sin'. But now, she doesn't know anymore. Now that she learned that someone died while waiting for her, she felt a little guilty. She felt so heavy, as if the burden left behind 6 years ago was increased by the death of the old woman who kept waiting for her. Though she's very broken and sad deep inside, she still kept her composure on and did not show any emotions on her face. Just a dull poker face.

Because of what she did, Kagura felt a little scared. _What if I they're mad at me? What if I don't have anywhere to go to? What if I don't belong here anymore? What if…I'm all…alone?_ She kept asking those questions to herself. She looked down and kept cursing herself. She doesn't know what to do anymore.

"Uhmm…miss?" the shopkeeper asked, wiping his tears away.

"Wh-what?" she jolted.

"Here's your sukonbu."

And then she grabbed the bag from the shopkeeper. She planned on leaving immediately because the man must be angry with the girl who made his mom wait for long. But when she grabbed the bag, she noticed that it was a little heavier than usual. She looked inside the bag and surprised by what she saw. There she saw, 70 packs of sukonbu and a paper.

"Nee ojii-san, I just ordered 20." She calmly complained. "Can't you count properly? You gave me 70"

"Ahh yes. I added 50 extra sukonbu." The shopkeeper answered happily

"Why? Out of business?"

"Mom said to give that girl 50 sukonbu when she comes. And you really came." Then the vendor smiled at her and sighed. _"She was right…this girl have an offensive mouth and she…sure doesn't sugarcoat her words…"_

Then Kagura stared at him then ran away. She could not explain her feeling but she felt so heavy, but still she was so happy. She felt relieved because of what just happened. She felt that some of the emotions that she left behind came back to her. She kept running until she reached the park where she usually stayed when she was walking her dog, Sadaharu. Then another idea popped on her mind.

 _"_ _I'll visit them while I'm here!"_

And then her usual positive side came back but, that was only a façade. Then again she started walking until she caught the sight of the familiar building where she stayed 6 years ago. She went closer to the building and saw that it still looks the same as the past 6 years. Kagura felt a little happy about that, but also had some doubts. She slowly went inside of the shop, until she heard a familiar voice behind her.

"K-Kagura-chan?"

When Kagura heard that voice behind her, she could not control her emotions anymore. She was full excitement, happiness and a little bit of fear. Well, it's been 6 years since she heard that irritating voice. Yes, the voice of a glasses wearing a human, Shinpachi. Slowly, she turned around to see what kind of face that boy has after 6 years without contact with each other. She planned on teasing him because of his super surprised and funny face that she expected. However, instead of an astounded face, what she saw was a face full of disbelief and irritation.

"What did you come here for?" he asked furiously.

"P-patsuan…?" That's the only thing she was able to say. She was utterly shocked by Shinpachi's reaction.

"Why did you come here?" he asked again. "After leaving us years ago without a word, why did you suddenly return here?!"

"Shinpachi…I came here to visit all of you."

"Visit? After leaving us clueless, you're just going to casually visit us?" He said. "You will leave us again, worried about your condition and your whereabouts?"

"P-patsuan, hear me out – "

"You don't know how worried Otose-san and my sister are…" he said. "Aneue even collapsed while searching for you, day and night. She didn't care about what happens to her, as long as she can find you."

"Eh? Anego did tha – "

"Tama-san scanned around the whole Edo to search for you. She even over-heated in the process." He said again, not letting Kagura finish her sentence. "Catherine-san and Otose-san took the liberty of taking care and calming Sadaharu for he was too wild when he learned that you were gone. They did that even though they are full of dog bites"

Speechless, Kagura was only able to look Shinpachi's maddened face with her own terrified face. She really had no idea that her departure 6 years ago would make him this angry. She can't believe that she made tons of people suffer, and those people were her loved ones. She didn't know that they did so much sacrifices for her. Still, she can't blame anyone but only herself. It's true that it's her fault for suddenly leaving them in the air. It's her own fault for leaving because of her own selfishness and emotions. But she didn't expect these outcomes.

"Speechless, huh" then he gave a wry smile. "Then leave."

"Huh?"

"I said leave! Go away!" He shouted.

Kagura was, again, speechless. Her mind and heart cannot bear her overflowing emotions. She was so shocked by Shinpachi's outraged face. Her mind was blank. She was unable to speak for her own. She cannot think of anything that would make him listen to her.

"What? You don't want to? You're going to stay here again, make us happy and then leave once more?" He said, this time with tears flowing from his eyes.

"If you're going to do that, then go away. I don't want Aneue and the others be hurt again…BY YOU"

"B-but Patsuan I – "

"LEAVE NOW! And you have no right to call me by that name. _He_ is the only one who's allowed to call me that."

With him shouting at her and never letting the latter finish her sentences, she ran away. For the first time in 6 years, she cried once again so hard. She cursed and cursed and cursed herself for what she had just done. She didn't consider the feelings of the ones she left behind. She was there, spending her years happily while the others kept searching for her and were worried for her. She was so selfish. She hated herself. _She wanted to kill herself._ She was unable to defend herself from Shinpachi's anger. Normally, she would just shout at him and ask him why he is angry but this time, she was incapable of doing it. Why? Because everything that he said was true.

She kept running and running until she reached a place that was very unknown and new to her. It was a very beautiful lake surrounded by green summer trees. It was so beautiful. It was so beautiful that she can't stop crying,

 _"_ _I'm sorry…everyone…I'm sorry"_

She kept apologizing to everyone and kept crying. Her eyes were all red and swollen. He breathing was out of sync. She wanted to talk to someone that might want to accompany her but, she realized something. She realized that she was alone. No one cared for her anymore. No one accepts her anymore. No one…remembers her true face. She was all alone.

Convinced by that answer, she looked up in the sky and then looked at the beautiful scenery in front of her. She was still crying and thought: _"It's so pretty…"_ That view made her think that maybe Gin-chan and the others would be happy if they saw that view. But then she remembered, that it was impossible. There's no way they will be able to enjoy that scenery happily after everything that happened and after leaving them. It's almost impossible to adore that scenery after leaving a large scar on their hearts. She was thinking all of that until she heard someone talk far behind her.

"Oi you sentimental woman over there! Move away. Your gloomy mood destroys the beauty of this scene."

Surprised, Kagura was only able to stop crying and recall on whose voice it belonged to. Until she remembered the face of a certain man she hated so much. But she can't remember his name, nor what she calls him. Her memory was too hazy to recall it because of what just happened with Shinpachi.

The only way to remember it was to look at his face. Slowly she turned around and was able to peek at the face of the young man. And what she was far from what she had expected.

"What's with that look? As if you saw a ghost. Do you want to be killed?" The man asked again.

She didn't reply to the man's question. She was still inspecting the man. She was expecting a man clad in black outfit, with short sandy brown hair and reddish brown eyes. But what she saw was a man wearing a red uwagi, gray-colored hakama and a beige-colored scarf around his neck. That man also had 2 swords, one long and the other one short. Sure he had sandy brown hair, but his hair was tied with a ponytail and his eyes were deep bloody red. And he was way taller than the man that she was imagining a while ago. Then a person popped in her mind.

"H*mura K*nshin? Are you cosplaying him?" She asked.

"Huh? Who's that? Don't go telling me that I'm cosplaying or what. We don't even know each other" He said while scratching the back of his head. "By the way, who are you?"

"K-kagura."

Upon hearing the girl's name, the man's sharp eyes suddenly became round and he blinked twice. He wasn't sure if he heard her right. It's been years since he last heard that name. He looked carefully at the woman and realized that they had the same vermillion-colored hair and azure eyes. The only difference was the body structure and clothing. The woman had the curves which she didn't have 6 years ago. With that, he finally concluded. It was really her. His own China beast rival.

"C-china?!"

That nickname made Kagura remember the name of the man. Okita Sougo. The Prince of the Planet of Sadists that she hated so much. Her own Sadist bastard rival.

"Sadist?!"

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Aaaaaand that's for the first chapter. Hurray! ( ***claps** )  
For those who were disappointed for Okita's short appearance in the story, I'm very sorry. I planned on making him appear earlier but then I realized some problems when I'm going to do it. (it's _a secret)_

But fear not, my friends, because for sure in the next chapter, Okita will have a looooot of scenes there with Kagura. I PROMISE.

But I have some bad news...  
1\. I will be posting the next chapter maybe on August because our school will be celebrating our centennial year so we have to make a lot of preparations, especially since our class is the best or star section in our grade level (Grade 8)  
2\. Surely, because of that the teachers will give us tons of projects regarding that celebration so I will be busy this month of July.

That's why I'm going to apologize right away so you won't be angry or sad. But I also promise that I'll be posting the second and third chapter at the same time, as an apology for you guys...

Again, I'm veeeery sorry for all of you guys ( ***cries and bows** ) Please don't be mad at me.( ***shiver** ) Be mad at our school ( _hehehehehe just kidding_ )  
Feel free to review your opinions, violent reactions, etc.  
Thank you beri beri mats~ ( ***waves and smiles** )


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